Monday, September 3, 2012

It's ok...

"It will all be ok in the end.   And if it's not ok, it's not the end."  - Paulo Coelho

I wonder how many times us parents have uttered these words to our children, as infants who wake up crying for one reason or another or no apparent reason at all, to our toddlers and young children who fall down or crash their bicycle, to our teenagers who suffer a broken heart.  Even as an adult I yearn for this reassurance from my parents at times.  It's ok; it will all be ok...

Being the mother of a newborn again, we are back to have crying be the main form of communication and sometimes my newborn (and my toddler also for that matter) cry for no apparent reason.  Or sometimes they may be worried or scared or hurt or angry but I, the all-knowing mother, ; ) can see that really it is all ok.

Even when my newborn cries because she's hungry or needs changed, I know what she needs and don't even really need her to cry to tell me.

And I wonder about how people often compare God to a parent and wonder if God really is like a parent if our prayers to God are kind of like a baby's cries.  That really God already knows what we want and God also already knows what we need.  I often think that prayers are really more for us, to remind us that we're not alone, that God is there, and that S/He is holding us, nomatter what we're doing or where we go.  It reminds me of Lucia when she cries and cries and then finally calms down and rests cradled in my arms- it's that moment when her will meets mine and she is comforted and at peace.

As I've learned over the years that my plan for myself is probably not ultimately the best for me, I have changed the way I pray and find that rather than asking for whatever I think I want, I just pray "Your will be done." and ask for peace, grace and comfort for myself or those that need it, (which is really asking myself and others to be open to it because God as a perfect parent will offer it regardless.)

I still don't understand a lot of things that happen in this world- child abuse, cancer, torture, and all kinds of other painful, horrible experiences people go through.  But I do believe that when we give these things over to God and give ourselves over to God, that we can become vessels of something much greater than we ever imagined.  We can turn tragedies into stories of inspiration and hope. 

Whatever I am called to face now and in the future, I just pray I can be a little more like my peaceful, sleeping girls, resting in God and trusting without a doubt, it really is ok.

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