Most of us know the way the serenity prayer starts:
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change
The courage to change the things I can
And the wisdom to know the difference.
This in and of itself is so powerful and its relevance has permeated so many parts of my life. But the rest of the prayer is quite insightful as well... Each set of lines contains so much wisdom...
Living one day at a time
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as a pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right if I surrender to His will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
And supremely happy with Him forever in the next.
By Theologian Reinhold Niebuhr
Thank you, Mom, for sending this to me! It's a great reminder of what I should be focused on.
Saturday, April 24, 2010
Thursday, April 22, 2010
Reminders
Sometimes we need to be reminded that we are imperfect and make mistakes. Sometimes we need to be reminded that people love us anyway. And sometimes we need to be reminded that it's important to be compassionate because generally people don't do things "wrong" intentionally.
I found a mistake that I made on a date/cost sheet at work yesterday. As soon as I found it, I told the people who needed to know, apologized and offered some solutions. (Lesson in humility)
I felt awful, but as soon as I came home, Juan Carlos gave me a big hug. No words were needed - that was enough to give me the strength to keep going... (people love us anyway)
This morning, after I got to work, I sat down to read my email and saw my supervisor had responded by saying that it was my fault and only my fault and pointing out another mistake she thought I had recently made.
This morning, before I went to work, I saw that my brother in law had left the milk out on the counter all night- I was upset and thought about saying something- then I thought of my mistake and I thought he probably didn't do it on purpose, so I just put the milk back in the refrigerator.
(we need to be compassionate)
My prayer is this:
May I never cease to make mistakes and to be humbled by them so as to avoid becoming too proud.
May I always accept responsibility when I do make mistakes and try to make the best ammends possible.
May I always be compassionate and kind to others when they make mistakes or don't behave the way I wish they would, knowing that I, too, make mistakes and don't always behave the way others wish.
May I be the first person to validate someone who has made a mistake and to remind them they are loved in spite of it.
I found a mistake that I made on a date/cost sheet at work yesterday. As soon as I found it, I told the people who needed to know, apologized and offered some solutions. (Lesson in humility)
I felt awful, but as soon as I came home, Juan Carlos gave me a big hug. No words were needed - that was enough to give me the strength to keep going... (people love us anyway)
This morning, after I got to work, I sat down to read my email and saw my supervisor had responded by saying that it was my fault and only my fault and pointing out another mistake she thought I had recently made.
This morning, before I went to work, I saw that my brother in law had left the milk out on the counter all night- I was upset and thought about saying something- then I thought of my mistake and I thought he probably didn't do it on purpose, so I just put the milk back in the refrigerator.
(we need to be compassionate)
My prayer is this:
May I never cease to make mistakes and to be humbled by them so as to avoid becoming too proud.
May I always accept responsibility when I do make mistakes and try to make the best ammends possible.
May I always be compassionate and kind to others when they make mistakes or don't behave the way I wish they would, knowing that I, too, make mistakes and don't always behave the way others wish.
May I be the first person to validate someone who has made a mistake and to remind them they are loved in spite of it.
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Making it work
Hi, this is totally a "shout out" for advice and direction. I have been less than satisfied in my current position and am looking for something else. What that is, I'm really not sure, but I am definitely feeling pulled towards options that would allow me to have more autonomy and to be home more- ideally it would be education related- it might be teaching part-time, teaching online, tutoring, or maybe a combination.
Some things I have to think about are:
1) I am the main source of income for our family currently- I would need to make around $3000/month to keep our current lifestyle- could make less if we found ways to cut back
2) We have a mortgage to pay so moving somewhere cheaper is not an easy solution...
3) Somehow, I need to have some kind of health insurance for our family...
So, how did you make it work? Where did you cut back? How much were you able to save? Are you working from home? Are you working part-time? Does anyone have private health insurance or do something for health insurance that is not through work?
Please feel free to leave a comment with your story and input or write me an email if that's easier: jandjcgarcia@gmail.com
Thanks in advance- I REALLY appreciate it!
Some things I have to think about are:
1) I am the main source of income for our family currently- I would need to make around $3000/month to keep our current lifestyle- could make less if we found ways to cut back
2) We have a mortgage to pay so moving somewhere cheaper is not an easy solution...
3) Somehow, I need to have some kind of health insurance for our family...
So, how did you make it work? Where did you cut back? How much were you able to save? Are you working from home? Are you working part-time? Does anyone have private health insurance or do something for health insurance that is not through work?
Please feel free to leave a comment with your story and input or write me an email if that's easier: jandjcgarcia@gmail.com
Thanks in advance- I REALLY appreciate it!
Monday, April 5, 2010
Good Friday
April 2nd, 2010
This year for Good Friday, I really wanted to do something to reflect on and feel the impact of Christ's death and resurrection. So, on Good Friday, which I conveniently had off from work, I invited my parents and Juan Carlos's mom over and we made a "simple meal" Mexican style which consisted of beans, cheese and homemade tortillas...ok, so Juan Carlos insisted on sardines too, but not all of us ate that...
After dinner, we watched the movie "The Passion of the Christ" and I just have to say this is such an incredibly well-done film. The first time I saw it was in college with a bunch of people from Newman Catholic Campus Ministry and having that visual to think back on during mass and throughout the Easter season just really changed my ability to connect to what Christ did for us.
You would think after seeing it several times now, the movie would lose its impact but I seem to get something different out of it every time. When we watched it on Friday, I couldn't hold back the tears when it flashed back to Mary running after "little boy" Jesus when he fell down and showed her running after him as he fell when he was carrying the cross. How great her suffering must have been to have to watch her "little boy" suffer like that...
And Easter Sunday mass during the consecration, I just kept thinking of what Jesus did in "giving his body" and what a big deal that really was and is. And I thought about Mary and the people that loved him and how difficult it must have been to stand by and watch someone they loved suffer so much without being able to stop it.
Sometimes I think it's so easy for us to get caught up in the "routine" of mass and prayer. I felt for awhile like I was going to mass out of more of an obligation or habit than out of a real desire to connect with God and the community. And these kinds of films are such gifts to people like me because they really pull me in and make me think and give me the images I need to understand the reality of sacrifice and the influence of evil and the beauty of love.
I felt challenged after seeing it to accept my small cross at work of not feeling valued or appreciated with more grace and to try not to complain. If Jesus can forgive and ask forgiveness for the people who literally beat him to death, shouldn't I be able to do that with a supervisor who I have a hard time with?
I also felt challenged to try to be really strong physically in facing childbirth. My hypnobirthing class gave me a lot of hope and helped me to see childbirth as something very "do-able" but as the day draws closer and more and more people share their stories and opinions, I've been feeling myself get pretty anxious again. Expecting to feel pain or to suffer is a kind of strange situation but so much about this parallels what Christ went through. He knew to an extent what lay before him when he was in the garden of Gethsemane and he accepted the physical suffering he had to endure because it was for something greater than himself.
I feel like that about childbirth. Obviously, giving birth is not the same as bringing salvation to the world, nor is the physical pain comparable, but the parallel helps me to be stronger- maybe if he did all that for me, I can go through this comparatively small thing for Him.
If you've never seen the movie, I HIGHLY recommend it- sure it's tougher to watch than a light romantic comedy and isn't exactly an "escape" kind of film but I think it serves as a very important reminder in our lives about who we are, what we believe, who we want to be and how close or far we are from getting there...
This year for Good Friday, I really wanted to do something to reflect on and feel the impact of Christ's death and resurrection. So, on Good Friday, which I conveniently had off from work, I invited my parents and Juan Carlos's mom over and we made a "simple meal" Mexican style which consisted of beans, cheese and homemade tortillas...ok, so Juan Carlos insisted on sardines too, but not all of us ate that...
After dinner, we watched the movie "The Passion of the Christ" and I just have to say this is such an incredibly well-done film. The first time I saw it was in college with a bunch of people from Newman Catholic Campus Ministry and having that visual to think back on during mass and throughout the Easter season just really changed my ability to connect to what Christ did for us.
You would think after seeing it several times now, the movie would lose its impact but I seem to get something different out of it every time. When we watched it on Friday, I couldn't hold back the tears when it flashed back to Mary running after "little boy" Jesus when he fell down and showed her running after him as he fell when he was carrying the cross. How great her suffering must have been to have to watch her "little boy" suffer like that...
And Easter Sunday mass during the consecration, I just kept thinking of what Jesus did in "giving his body" and what a big deal that really was and is. And I thought about Mary and the people that loved him and how difficult it must have been to stand by and watch someone they loved suffer so much without being able to stop it.
Sometimes I think it's so easy for us to get caught up in the "routine" of mass and prayer. I felt for awhile like I was going to mass out of more of an obligation or habit than out of a real desire to connect with God and the community. And these kinds of films are such gifts to people like me because they really pull me in and make me think and give me the images I need to understand the reality of sacrifice and the influence of evil and the beauty of love.
I felt challenged after seeing it to accept my small cross at work of not feeling valued or appreciated with more grace and to try not to complain. If Jesus can forgive and ask forgiveness for the people who literally beat him to death, shouldn't I be able to do that with a supervisor who I have a hard time with?
I also felt challenged to try to be really strong physically in facing childbirth. My hypnobirthing class gave me a lot of hope and helped me to see childbirth as something very "do-able" but as the day draws closer and more and more people share their stories and opinions, I've been feeling myself get pretty anxious again. Expecting to feel pain or to suffer is a kind of strange situation but so much about this parallels what Christ went through. He knew to an extent what lay before him when he was in the garden of Gethsemane and he accepted the physical suffering he had to endure because it was for something greater than himself.
I feel like that about childbirth. Obviously, giving birth is not the same as bringing salvation to the world, nor is the physical pain comparable, but the parallel helps me to be stronger- maybe if he did all that for me, I can go through this comparatively small thing for Him.
If you've never seen the movie, I HIGHLY recommend it- sure it's tougher to watch than a light romantic comedy and isn't exactly an "escape" kind of film but I think it serves as a very important reminder in our lives about who we are, what we believe, who we want to be and how close or far we are from getting there...
Happy Birthday, Dad!
April 1st, 2010
Daddy-
You are such an incredible man and such an amazing father. You have provided me and our family with so many opportunities and so much insight and perspective. I love continuing to get to know you, learning about your background and your values and hearing about why you think the way you do- about people, about work, about politics, about God and about life. I love being able to come to you for advice on everything from financial decisions to working under a difficult supervisor. Your honest advice has helped me to become a better person. I can't wait for Dani to meet you too! It will be so awesome to see you as a grandpa. As Mom would say, I love you all the way to heaven and back! Happy birthday! We are so blessed to have you in this world!
Love,
Janelle
Daddy-
You are such an incredible man and such an amazing father. You have provided me and our family with so many opportunities and so much insight and perspective. I love continuing to get to know you, learning about your background and your values and hearing about why you think the way you do- about people, about work, about politics, about God and about life. I love being able to come to you for advice on everything from financial decisions to working under a difficult supervisor. Your honest advice has helped me to become a better person. I can't wait for Dani to meet you too! It will be so awesome to see you as a grandpa. As Mom would say, I love you all the way to heaven and back! Happy birthday! We are so blessed to have you in this world!
Love,
Janelle
Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad!
March 27th, 2010
"The greatest thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother."
I remember this quote being in a little frame growing up and not really understanding it. As a child, I thought there were probably a lot of things my father could do for me more directly than just loving my mom. I only now have begun to realize what an incredibly amazing gift it is to have parents who love and respect each other. They don't make me choose sides. My mom is happy when I do something loving for my father and my father is happy when I do something loving for my mother. There is no jealousy or competition or silly games between them. I never blamed myself for their not getting along because in my 26 years of life I have never even seen them fight...
On the contrary, I have seen ways that my mom has served my father and our family by making healthy homemade meals and keeping our home clean and making so many opportunities possible in our lives. And I've seen ways my father, too, has loved my mother and our family by working hard, always trying to make our quality of life better, and supporting us in countless different ways.
Through their example, I am able to have a better marriage because they have shown me that sometimes you do things because you love someone, not because they sound fun- that sometimes it's better to let the small things go. They have shown me what it means to be responsible and loving, to express what I need and give all I can.
What an incredible gift their marriage has been to me and to all who know them. I remember someone saying once that the idea behind marriage is that you're better as a couple than you would be as individuals. My parents are incredible people as individuals but what they've accomplished and given to those around them as a couple is admirable and inspiring.
"The greatest thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother."
I remember this quote being in a little frame growing up and not really understanding it. As a child, I thought there were probably a lot of things my father could do for me more directly than just loving my mom. I only now have begun to realize what an incredibly amazing gift it is to have parents who love and respect each other. They don't make me choose sides. My mom is happy when I do something loving for my father and my father is happy when I do something loving for my mother. There is no jealousy or competition or silly games between them. I never blamed myself for their not getting along because in my 26 years of life I have never even seen them fight...
On the contrary, I have seen ways that my mom has served my father and our family by making healthy homemade meals and keeping our home clean and making so many opportunities possible in our lives. And I've seen ways my father, too, has loved my mother and our family by working hard, always trying to make our quality of life better, and supporting us in countless different ways.
Through their example, I am able to have a better marriage because they have shown me that sometimes you do things because you love someone, not because they sound fun- that sometimes it's better to let the small things go. They have shown me what it means to be responsible and loving, to express what I need and give all I can.
What an incredible gift their marriage has been to me and to all who know them. I remember someone saying once that the idea behind marriage is that you're better as a couple than you would be as individuals. My parents are incredible people as individuals but what they've accomplished and given to those around them as a couple is admirable and inspiring.
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